In Richard M. Stephenson’s article, Social Problems, he cited a research that was conducted to find out what types of people are actually involved in group sex. It was discovered that a significant number of those who engaged in group sex were regularly conformists (whether married or not) to other aspects of life – that is to say that they were the kind of people who followed norms or even rules set by society. One of the reasons they gave for involving themselves in group sex was that one of the satisfactions group sex gave them was that of “increased quality, quantity and frequency of sex”. Some couples even attributed their improved sexual performance because of the new experience they have encountered in engaging in group sex. Some of them claimed that they found it as an enhancement to their relationships because it spiced up their otherwise “conventional” sex lives. (Stephenson, 1973)
What is the conventional sex life? Is it not the kind of sex life that is was supposed to be? That is to say, isn’t it that the conventionality of sex life is its actual nature? This nature can then be traced back to how God intended human sexuality to be – one which radiates a “language of love”, as Lauren Winner would put it. Group sex definitely goes against this conventional nature of sex because not only does it demote that language of love that was meant for spouses, it also damages the view of the joy of sexual intercourse the spouses supposedly share. In saying that people who are involved in group sex get satisfaction from increased frequency of sex is an indication that they are no longer adequately satisfied with the normal, intended frequency of conventional sex. This in turn has consequences in marriage.
In Duane Denfeld’s article, The Family Coordinator, another research was conducted for the counselors who have had patients that quit the lifestyle of group sex. From the nine hundred and sixty-five questionnaires that the counselors answered, some of the reasons for their counselees’’ quitting were: the feelings of guilt, emotional attachments that were developed outside of the committed relationships, fear of discovery, threat to marriage, boredom, and many more. Even if the reasons why the couples quit are not really surprising, it is noteworthy that those reasons were precisely a contradiction to the opinions of the people mentioned in Stephenson’s article. The couples engaged in group sex soon found out that the activity was no longer exciting enough, no longer satisfying enough. Many of the couples also found the activity leading to a threat to their marital bond because of jealousy that caused more fighting between them. (Denfeld, 1974) This is not unlike the example of overconsumption of alcoholic beverage. Engaging in sexual intercourse was supposed to be in the context of marriage so when these couples went overboard, they suffered the consequences. According to the Christian teaching, the grace of God in terms of sexual intercourse was only available for those who were in the sacramental marriage of which conditions was that those who are part of it are a man and a woman, and that their relationship is shared and approved with and by the community of Christ’s body.
Denfeld, D. (1974). Dropouts from Swinging. The Family Coordinator , 45-49.
Stephenson, R. M. (1973). Involvement in Deviance: An Example and Some Theoretical Implications. Social Problems , 173-190 .